If I Could Write To The Kid I Was Before

Dear Person,

A few days ago, I had a sudden realization, one of the greatest, most eye-opening realizations anyone can have. I realized that I’m happy. And despite the multitude of crap storms that I’ve been through over the past four years, despite the many emotional, physical, and mental battles I’ve been through, I’m happy. How? By not letting those negative experiences define my time here on Earth.

Let me tell you, these years in college have been some of the most stressful, agonizing, frustrating, BEST years of my life, and it pains me to see it all come to a screeching halt. But instead of dragging my feet through my last moments here at Cal Poly, willing the clock to somehow stop or slow down, I’m going to celebrate the life that it has brought me, a life I never would have fathomed to come to be four years ago.

Like I said before, I have had my fair share of crap storms over the years. But you see, the thing about storms is that they all end, and eventually you see the sun again. With the promise of a better tomorrow, along with the Grace of God and a handful of close friends, I always came out on the other side a stronger person – and I want you to know that you can, too. Despite all of the hurtful messages, heated arguments, nervous breakdowns, and the parade of people who walked away, all of these things happened for a reason, and before you know it, you’ll find yourself still standing with a few battle wounds.

A friend once told me to not regret anything because at one point, it was what you wanted. You were only doing what you thought you wanted, what you thought was right. Right or wrong, it was those things that got you here today. Even though it might seem like you’re at a standstill at times and that the decisions you’re making are getting you nowhere, one day you’re going to look back and realize just how far you’ve come. You’re going to look back at those anxiety attacks, awkward silences, and less-than-pleasant situations and say, “Wow, I got through that” and you will move on. Sometimes, you need to be at the finish line to realize the distance you’ve traveled, and when you finally do look over your shoulder, you’re going to like what you see.

But as you move forward and onward, don’t forget the people who got you there. Don’t forget those who helped you find your voice, those who helped you find yourself. Don’t forget those who stood by you and helped you pick up the pieces when you fell apart, and don’t forget those who gave you your space and stood by as you fixed yourself. Most importantly, don’t forget that ultimately it was you who picked yourself up when you had fallen, and it was you that put yourself back together when you were broken.

Finally, when you feel like nothing is going right and when the break in the clouds is nowhere in sight, don’t forget that God is right next to you, always guiding you, always motivating you, always reminding you just how beautiful life can be.

Don’t forget that life is beautiful.

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